UPDATE: Yes, But Did the Fleeing Flight Attendant Grab the Craft Beer!?

August 17th, 2010

OK, this is only marginally beer-related (and almost surely not craft beer-related), but it is the best story of the day you will find that has some sort of connection to beer.

A jetBlue flight attendant upset because a passenger refused to apologize after accidentally striking him with luggage, allegedly spewed obscenities over the PA system, then activated and slid down a plane’s emergency chute before disappearing into a terminal at John F. Kennedy airport Monday, an airport official said.

JetBlue Flight 1052 from Pittsburgh had taxied to a stop at Terminal 5, Gate C around noon Monday when flight attendant Steven Slater, 38, was struck in the head with luggage that a passenger was trying to unload from an overhead compartment, according to an airport official with knowledge of the incident.

Slater demanded an apology from the passenger, the official said, but the passenger refused. The two argued before the passenger told Slater to  “f— off”, the official said. The official said that Slater then got on the plane’s PA system and directed that same obscenity at all the passengers and added that he especially meant it for the man who refused to apologize.

Slater is alleged to have then activated the plane’s inflatable emergency slide, grabbed two beers from the galley, then slid down the chute, the official said.

So now you have two people recommended by Barbeerians to invite to your next party. You’re welcome.

UPDATE: Sadly, TMZ is reporting that our hero, Mr. Slater, is no longer our hero. He–and I can barely say this without breaking out in tears–grabbed two Blue Moons before fleeing down the inflatable shoot. Sorry, Steven, but your 15 minutes of fame on BarBeerians are now officially over. UNINVITED FROM FUTURE PARTIES.

Flight Attendant Pops Emergency Chute, Escapes Plane at JFK — The Wall Street Journal

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Another Reason to Only Drink Craft Beer

August 6th, 2010

Last thing I knew, a flavorful IPA didn’t make your town smell like disease. Crappy beer in Pennsylvania, though…

City Brewing Co. has temporarily halted production at its plant in Latrobe after residents complained of a foul odor coming from the municipal sewage plant. Officials suspect sugary drinks now being produced at the brewery are causing wastewater treatment problems.

Municipal authority manager Tom Gray says the stench started about two weeks ago. The Department of Environmental Protection received complaints, prompting it to send an inspector out before the brewery shut down Tuesday.

Apparently Rolling Rock used to be made there, but no longer. Let that be a lesson to everyone: sugary beer drinks are evil.

Associated Press — Pa. brewery shuts down over stinky odor complaints

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Hey, Who Wants Some F#%@ing Beer!?

March 29th, 2010

I’m clearly a fan of great names for beers, but this one might take the cake since it shares two of my greatest interests: creativity and well-placed vulgarity, something our European friends apparently have mastered.

A CHEEKY brewer has won the right to market a beer named after the Austrian village of F**king.

The European Patent Office originally rejected the brand ‘F**king Hell beer’ saying it contained a swear word.

But after the brewery proved the village of F**king actually existed, EU officials were forced to back down.

Brewery spokesman Stefan Fellenberg said: “In German the word for a lager beer is a Helles Beer, so we have also patented the name F**king Hell, which means lager from F**king of course.

So get in line to try some of your own Fucking Hell Beer when it comes to your town. Something tells me that date will be coming a long, long time from now. Is this the new trend in novelty beers? We’ll see. Maybe some of the breweries in Butte, MT, will have something up their sleeves. Or trousers.

The Sun News — Brewing scandal over F***ing beer

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But is Jesus Drinking Craft Beer!?

February 22nd, 2010

A brief list of things I must know in this world: 1) When will Modest Mouse start making good music again? 2) When will I be able to write about beer for a living? 3) Will Michigan sports ever let me watch them without balling my eyes out and throwing the cat at the television? And 4) If Jesus were going to throw back a few at the bar, would he order Bud Light or something significantly better?

Well, thanks to some interesting folks in India, I’m getting closer to finding out the answer to one my everlasting questions!

GAUHATI, India — Authorities in a Christian-majority state in India’s remote northeast have confiscated all copies of a school textbook that carried a picture of Jesus Christ holding a can of beer and a cigarette, an official said Saturday.

The primary school textbook, which teaches cursive handwriting, used the picture of Jesus on the page for the letter ‘I’ – to represent Idol.

Ampareen Lyngdoh, education minister of Meghalaya state, strongly criticized the illustration.

“I am appalled and condemn the violent pictorial presentation of Christ. The children for whom the textbook was meant look up to Christ with reverence, and they are shocked beyond words,” Lyngdoh said.

The government has seized all copies of the textbook from schools and bookshops in Meghalaya for offending public sentiment, she said.

Yeah, I suppose that’s pretty bad. I mean, who would want to teach kids to smoke and drink at such a young age? Shame on you, Jesus. You better get your life together. Also: Jesus on a Bender–best band name ever? I think so. Make it happen, readers.

I’m going to assume the picture attached to the post isn’t the actual image. A Google image search of “beer Jesus” puts forth some quality examples. Props to anyone who can actually find the real, printed beer-drinkin’, chain-smokin’ Jesus.

Washington Post — Indian state removes book with Jesus holding beer

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Bibles and Beer: A Match Made in Heaven

January 29th, 2010

When I think of religion, I rarely think of beer. When I think of beer, I definitely don’t think of religion. However, one Bishop in Indiana is trying to change that with a rather unique approach: holding a “Theology on Tap” session at a local bar.

It may seem a bit unorthodox, but newly installed Bishop Kevin Rhoades has no qualms about reaching out to young adults at Columbia Street West, which is gearing up for its typically loud weekends.

“I think it’s important that the church be present where our young people are. And a venue like this is great. Young people like to get together and have a beer or whatever,” explained Bishop Rhoades. “Why not?”

I like the sound of this guy already. Also, Drunk Bishop may or may not be a character on Conan. Just sayin’. But we want to know if he had a drink! And what does a Bishop drink? So many unanswered questions!

Indiana’s Newscenter — A Bishop, A Beer, And A Pint of Theology

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Trend Watch: Sir, Your Double Shot Mocha Latte Skim Soy Oatmeal Stout is Ready

January 21st, 2010

I’m not a fan of Starbucks. Not because it’s corporate or because I’m organic or anything like that. I just think their coffee stinks. Plus, I hate waiting in line while absurd names that are somehow still considered coffee drinks are called out to the busy and rushed WASPs hovering and anticipating their silly and frilly touch of caffeine along with a mountain of sugar and hazelnut Irish creme extract. ‘Bucks don’t even call larges large–something fake Italian or French instead. But now, former CEO Howard Schultz has some unique ideas to help the now-floundering coffee giant that has run into economic mistakes it made during the 2000s.

Schultz brought back an entrepreneurs approach to the business realizing that one size does not fit all. Starbucks is now trying to tailor itself to its customer base. For example, in hotter areas, drinkers prefer cold drinks, while in the colder regions like the Northeast, they enjoy a piping hot cup of joe.

The idea is to make each store unique, while maintaining the Starbucks quality of coffee and espresso. In Seattle, owners created an offshoot of Starbucks called 15th Ave Coffee and Tea. The shop, which Starbucks owns, sells heady microbrews and cheese along with the usual espresso and tea mix.

Now you can’t go and get beer at every Starbucks, but it’s an interesting choice for a company that is always looking to find new ways of making money. Between Sonic Youth compilation CDs and new on-the-go coffee drinks, Starbucks is really looking to enter a new stage in life, and it looks like they’re bringing microbrews along for the ride. It will be interesting to see if this is something that catches on throughout the country and if small-minded microbreweries are in the mood to sell their beer through a big, bad corporate giant. But they could really take coffee beer to the next level. And we know how the FDA will feel about that.

HULIQ — Starbucks Slinging Beer Now Too

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They Might be Gross But They Should Be Legal!

January 11th, 2010

Call me old-fashioned, but I’m a fan of having a beer and a beer alone. I’ve never ventured into trying liquor in my beer, but there are some that might be fans of boilermakers, and by golly, they should be allowed to drink their boilermakers without the stigma attached to it and without the fear of being arrested at any moment! Get your act together, Nebraska!

Nebraska’s liquor cops want to wipe a 70-year-old ban against mixing booze and beer off the books, saying the original intent of the law that makes drinks like boilermakers illegal disappeared long ago.

But anti-drinking activists suspect another motive: Making it crystal clear that so-called “alcopops” like Mike’s Hard Lemonade and Smirnoff Ice are allowed in the state and that they can be taxed as beer.

“If they’re looking through the statutes for archaic laws, it’s odd this is the only one that came up,” said Diane Riibe, director of Omaha-based Project Extra Mile. “The commission is going to want to clean up state statutes that they think hinder their case.”

Project Extra Mile, which fights underage drinking, is one of several plaintiffs in a pending lawsuit that challenges the state Liquor Control Commission’s decision to allow flavored alcoholic beverages, or so-called “alcopops” to be classified as beer instead of hard liquor. Flavored alcoholic beverages start out as brewed malt beverages but are flavored with distilled spirits.

Oh, so this isn’t about changing an old and outdated law and allowing the best boilermaker drinkers out there to enjoy their unique drink? Who could have guessed this all would have been about economics? Even so, the origins of the boilermaker are interesting.

It’s unclear exactly why the beer-and-booze ban was enacted right after Prohibition, but the director of the Liquor Control Commission has a theory based on research he has done.

Hobert Rupe said it might have been a way to help ensure widespread liquor-by-the-drink bans in Nebraska and that followed Prohibition were followed. At the time, it was popular to inject liquor into nonalcoholic beer using syringes stuck into the corks of nonalcoholic beer bottles.

That way, drinkers could enjoy an alcoholic drink while making it look as if they were sipping on a nonalcoholic beer.

ABC News — Boilermaker Ban Plan Stirs Debate in Nebraska

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Are Beer-Drinking Women More Attractive?

January 7th, 2010

Looking to make a good impression on the first date, ladies? A new study out of the UK says you might want to pass on the gin and tonic and order an IPA instead.

Men get more impressed with girls who opt for beer or lager instead of a glass of wine or other more “girlie” drinks, a new UK survey has found.

But only one in 10 women would order a lager or beer when out on a date, the study commissioned by beer company BitterSweet Partnership found.

According to the men questioned for the survey, a beer glass makes the women [sic] appear more sexy, confident, fun and independent. Infact [sic again], it is a “turn-on” if a girl requested a beer on a first date, reports The Daily Express.

The way to a man’s heart goes through beer more and more every day.

The Times of India — Beer babes heads above wine sipping women

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Is There Anything Beer Can’t Fix?

January 5th, 2010

The perfect use for a can of Budweiser, if you ask me. If only all construction companies and all contractors decided that this was a good idea, we’d have a lot more better beer in the world. And a lot more deaths. Well, win some and you lose some, I guess.

Via: There, I Fixed It

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A Friendly Reminder

January 4th, 2010

I post this only because it might be the best headline I’ve ever seen. It’s an article from something called The Police News, whatever that is. Be careful out there, beer drinkers:

Drinking beer and peeing in police parking lot not smart

GulfCoastPoliceNews.Com – Clute

The Police News
January 4, 2010

CLUTE – It would be difficult for most men to do sober, but Clute police say 24-year old Sidney Francis Early stood in the parking lot of their police station, drank and beer and peed at the same time.

That, of course, did not set well with them, so he was promptly placed in the local jail and charged with being drunk in public.

Hope everyone had a good holiday. And that your name isn’t Sidney Francis Early.

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